Sep 16, 2011

Sue's Views

Dealing With Difficult People
By Sue Hulen

As artists we all know that there are times when we have to deal with difficult people. Clients can sometimes be the most difficult of all, but we run in to a lot of others that are just as difficult to deal with.
Most of the clients and others we deal with along the way are pretty agreeable and kind. And then there are the others who are not so kind nor agreeable and can too often be contrary. Contrary people are especially annoying because no matter what you may suggest or say about something they are always finding some way to be contrary. They can't possibly know they're that way or they certainly would change. If I said the sun was shining they would say that there are too many clouds and it looks like it will rain buckets.
There are some who have a really tough time being creative and feel as though they need to take from those who are creative. I'm not sure if they take from others because they're lazy, are not creative, or if they may just be a sort of mean individual who just doesn't care. For example, recently there has been some who will take from someone else's web site or blog and use their ideas as though they were their own. We all know that's not a good thing to do. It shows a true lack of character as well.

After much thought I've come to the conclusion that people who are difficult (in all the ways mentioned above) are not happy people. I'm thinking that rather than be angry with them or even laugh at them we should embrace them and show them by our own deeds and words they don't have to be so miserable. We can't change others, but by changing ourselves maybe we can encourage them to change. I'm not saying we have to excuse their bad behavior, but we can take the higher road rather than reducing ourselves to their level of unhappiness.

We shouldn't be so quick to judge such people because they may have had a really unhappy childhood or maybe they're truly going through some tough times right now. Some have never known happiness and kindness and I feel badly for them for that. We don't always realize how others see us until someone brings it up to us. Unfortunately they may bring it up in a nasty and mean way rather than in a kind and gentle way.
It's easy to sit back and pity or laugh at those who take from web sites and are truly transparent in their nasty deeds or for those who are also difficult in many other ways. But, to show them patience and kindness maybe they won't find it so easy to be so difficult.
Some people are so negative that they just can't find joy in anything, or at least not for very long. It's so easy to pity them, too, but pity isn't showing them how to turn their negativity into joy and positivity. I'm sure there are some who could actually find something negative in this article and those who would be so contrary as to pick it apart and show me all that is wrong with it (in their opinion). How can you find something negative in something so positive is curious to me, but we know those people are out there.

Some clients are never happy and most are very positive. Isn't it nice to be around people who are so positive and happy? Negative, disagreeable, contrary people just bring us down. They're so toxic. I don't know about you, but when I'm having to deal with someone so toxic I feel as though I've been through a war. They just beat me down and wear me out. I want to take a nap and a shower!
I'm just suggesting that rather than getting angry with those types of people we should embrace our differences, be happy we are not like them, and show them through word and deed that they too can be happy instead of being so miserable that they want others to be miserable with them. Everyone who knows me knows I'm a big fan of being kind to others. That's so important. At the end of the day all we have is our reputation, character, and our word.

I do want to thank those difficult people for one thing and that is that they always make me so happy that I'm not like them. We'll live longer if we keep being positive and spread our happiness to those who are lost in that dark place where they have no light.

Be kind to someone today.

Sue Hulen

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